
Emotional reactivity is a sign of unfinished business.
Children with RAD are adept at locating their parents buttons and pushing those buttons nonstop. During the time Braden was seeing Miss Laura, his pushing my buttons was a constant issue. Miss Laura helped me see that the reason these things bothered me so much was because I was reacting to a pain from my past. I know that sounds like a bunch of "psychological babble" but it is true. She walked me through the steps to figuring out why "acting dumb" irritated me so much. In a nutshell, I don't enjoy people manipulating me. No one does but it was especially problematic for me for reasons I won't go into.
So if your child has a behavior that you simply cannot abide, perhaps thinking about why it is such a problem will be helpful. Understanding why certain behavior's trigger you is very freeing.
I know being confronted about our parenting is a major trigger for me because of all we went through with CYS. So when someone does say something and I feel panic setting in, I usualy have the presence of mind to ask myself, "Am I being triggered? Or is this panic legitimate?"
Why is it that we feel we have the right to judge other's when we have never walked in their shoes?
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