Tristan is home once more. Kiana and Joseph were thrilled to have him home again. We picked him up at my parents on Friday evening. We don't get down there nearly as often as we should. The children think it would be so neat to live on a farm, guess the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence!
Saturday morning we went to meet John Houton a BCCYS approved RAD specialist. BCCYS wanted us to get a second opinion on Braden... to be sure he has RAD. After we introduced ourselves John asked why we were there. Ummm, cause CYS told us we have to! We told him our story and he said this happens often and he will gladly inform BCCYS that we are doing what needs to be done. We thought we would be out of his office within ten minutes but then he began sharing stories of his years of caring for children who have RAD. Some of the stories he shared made me cringe. He also clarified that we are not the problem Braden is. You cannot pull a child out of a troubled home, place him in a good home and expect smooth sailing. The child will continue to act out. They have a saying among therapists that if mom doesn't have PTSD or chronic depression the child doesn't have RAD. Very good observation. He also shared a the story of how he spoke to a group of CW and CYS professionals. He was explaining how RAD works, giving examples of the behaviors these children have and why they do the things they do. There was a group of people in the front row and he could hear them saying, "A child couldn't think up of these things on their own." "I don't believe it" etc. There was a foster father in the group and he stood up and verified everything that was said. The people still were not about to believe such a story so John told them they can come to another room after the meeting and meet with him and the dad if they want more info. They took him up on the offer and after talking awhile John discovered the foster child was in another room at the time. Dad gave permission for John to speak to said child. This little fellow walked in all smiles as charming as ever. He sweetly answered all of Johns questions. The last question was, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" The little fellow looked at John and said, "I want to grow up to be big and strong so I can kill him (pointing to dad) and her (pointing to mom). You could have heard a pin drop in the room. That my friends is RAD! Sweet and charming on the outside and a scary mix of feelings, emotions and thoughts on the inside.
Last night I had Deans family for the evening. It was kinda wet outdoors due to all the little showers we had through the day. The boys didn't mind, they played outdoors anyway. I didn't enjoy my evening very much as I had a nasty case of dizziness. I felt fine all day then around 3:30 a wave of dizziness came over me. As long as I stayed sitting and didn't turn my head to much I was ok. I did bump into the wall a few times while getting snack together and felt very out of it. I have an appointment with the chiropractor this morning. Usually one or two of my vertebrae are out of line. Not hard to fix but it does get wearisome running to the chiropractor every time I use my right arm too much. For some reason lifting or using my right arm to much makes the vertebrae twist.
Monday, August 19, 2013
I am a daughter of the King, wife to Dean and mother to four. 1 biological, 3 adopted through the foster care system. I enjoy reading, writing, coffee, research and caring for my family. Blogging is another hobby of mine, you can find my blog at: talesfromourhouse.blogspot.
com also follow me on FB Tales From Our House Blog. I blog about daily family life, Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder) and adoption. I would love to have you follow my blog so I can share the amazing things I am learning.