The reasoning of a child with FASD, should be listed under the definition of conundrum.
Mom says, "Do not throw balls in the house." The child throws a ball and breaks something but it isn't his fault because he didn't try to break anything. Giving a consequence may result in a rage.
Your child cannot understand you when you are speaking directly to him but he can hear and decipher what you are saying in another room when you are speaking in "code" to his dad.
He is unable to comprehend some children's books but is able to read adult books fluently.
Is unable to comprehend cause and effect in relation to himself but can clearly see how it pertains to everyone around him.
He is unable to recall events and relate them accurately, but he can tell elaborate lies that are perfectly believable.
He reminds his little sister not to talk to strangers, but he talks to everyone and anyone.
He cannot remember the words for every day items, mayo is called white ketchup and doors are called window things you walk through but he can carry an intelligent conversation with an adult.
This is the sobering reality for those who have fetal alcohol:
Developmental Age Equivalent
|Actual Age||18 years|
|Expressive language||20 years|
|Money and time concepts||8 years|
|Emotional maturity||6 years|
|Physical maturity||18 years|
|Reading ability||16 years|
|Social skills||7 years|
|Living skills||11 years|
In our experience, Joseph's "emotional age" varies from day to day. The difficulty in this is that some days he is "good enough" to do a certain activity and the next day he may not be. Sometimes he plays outside and some days he needs to be in line of vision at all times. Of course he views this as unfair and he is right, it isn't fair. Life isn't fair for anyone but especially for those affected alcohol in utero, they have a totally preventable disability.